My goal is to qualify for Boston and hopefully get 3:30:00 or under:) Hope to stay injury free and stay motivated!
I am reporting on this race so I can learn from it in the future if I decide I ever want to run another marathon.
I felt confident going into this marathon because I felt like I had trained pretty hard for it, that being said, now that I have run it I feel like I needed to run way more hills and do more core strengthening and overall weight training to be stronger.
I got 0 sleep the night before the race because I was so nervous and couldn't stop my mind. I was surprisingly pretty calm the morning of race day and my stomach felt pretty stable thanks to zupas the night before. When the race started I stayed in front of the 3:35 pacer and got in a good pace of my own. I felt good, not great or springy but good, my mind just was focused on staying under 1:50 for the first half which I did, my splits were
1-7:34.33, 2-7:46.70, 3-7:45.42, 4-7:37.58, 5-7:43.86, 6-7:46.95, 7-8:00.91, 8-8:06.52, 9-7:58.07, 10-7:58.86, 11-8:31.20, 12-8:17.46, 13-8:39.07, 14-8:54.13, 15-9:18.34, 16-8:41.11, 17-8:26.96, 18-8:25.73, 19-9:19.87, 20-9:20.01, 21-9:14.60, 22-8:49.14, 23-9:30.73, 24-9:27.15, 25-10:28.86, 26-10:20.10, .27-??
For the first half I ran 1:45 which I was happy with because there were rolling hills throughout it but when I hit the hill at mile 14 I felt like I didn't know how I would finish the race. I pushed through and kept thinking after this hill I will try for a negative split because the course overview said it was really downhill after that. I ran in to more rolling hills and even when I hit the good downhill of the course my legs just felt shot! About mile 15 or 16 the 3:35 pacer passed me and I died inside thinking I couldn't keep up and my goal was slipping out of my hands! I started becoming mentally defeated and kept throwing numbers around in my head thinking how fast I would have to run my miles to still qualify. I kept slowing down, kept walking through water breaks and kept slipping further and further from my goal. At mile 22 I could have still pushed really hard the last 4.27 miles and maybe got my time and my family was all cheering my on and Lexi joined me for that last 4 but I just didn't have it in me. My legs were shot and I was mentally checked out:( I just wanted to quit honestly. I was so dissapointed in myself and dissappointed in the time I was going to end up getting. I had hyped up qualifying so much that that was all I felt mattered. Looking back I am mad at myself for putting so much pressure on the time. I wish I would have just enjoyed the ride. I don't know how to change my way of thinking, and even now I wonder how I would change my mental state for another marathon. I know I will always try to qualify and I don't know how I could have forced myself to push harder the last 10 miles like I know I needed to. It makes me feel mentally weak because I felt so helpless and out of control. If anyone reads this please let me know your thoughts, any advice would be amazing. I am still feeling pretty confused and down about my performance for the last 10 miles. The course was beautiful when I focused on the scenery. The course was also a lot harder than I thought it would be with rolling hills throughout the first half with that good hill at mile 14. Also the last 4.27 miles were tough on a rolling trail into Ogden. I was so surprised that even on the good downhill portion of the course my legs felt dead. I know I just needed to train harder period. Less downhill training and more hill training. Part of me just wants to do it all over again and part of me never wants to feel that way again! Wow I'm a mess emotionally and mentally. I am having post race partum:/ if there is such a thing. All the training I put in feels waisted:( I am thinking of doing Utah Valley Marathon just because I trained so hard and would like a second chance to qualify but I worry about it turning out the same way. Any advice if anyone reads this would be greatly appreciated.
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